Return to Queen of Thieves Chapter Five

Queen of Thieves

Author: Robotguru
Rating: PG
Feedback: Please leave feedback on the Queen of Thieves thread on the Kitten Board.
Disclaimer: These characters are trademarks of Joss, ME, etc, I am not making money so please don't sue.
Note: Thoughts in < >.

So Willow, Makyrah and Miss Kitty had escaped the Cave of Wonders, but this was only to be the start of their journey. Meanwhile, at the palace...

"This is a bloody outrage." Giles sat on his throne as Tara and Ethan stood before him. "If it weren't for your years of service Ethan... well I... in the future, all sentences are to be discussed with me, before they are beheaded."

Ethan bows his head, thinking "not likely," "I assure you my highness, it will not happen again."

"Ethan, Tara, let's put this nasty business behind us, please?"

Ethan turns to Tara, "My humblest apologies to you also Princess."

Ethan takes Tara's hand to kiss it but she yanks it away, "At least one good thing will come of me being forced to marry, when I am queen, I will have the power to get rid of you."

Giles doesn't seem to notice the tension in the room, he also doesn't notice that Tara has turned to walk away, "Yes, yes. Very good, now Tara, about this suitor business," Giles looks up and finally sees that she has gone, "Tara?"

Giles hurries away after Tara leaving Ethan and Amy alone. Ethan's face has lost whatever false charm it had in Giles' presence, "If only I had gotten that lamp!"

"And to think, we still have to put up with those chumps."

"No Amy, only until they find a suitor idiot enough to marry her, then she'll have us banished... or beheaded."

Amy nearly pukes at the thought of Tara getting an extirminater to deal with her, then she has an idea, "Wait, wait! What if you were that idiot?!"

Ethan looks offended, "What?"

"Wait a minute, hear me out for one second. You marry Tara right? Then that makes you the Sultan."

It begins to click, "Ah yes, marry the bitch, that idea has merit."

"Well rats are cunning, anyway, you become Sultan, then we send papa-in-law and your little wife to the deepest, darkest realm you can conjure up." Amy starts to laugh maniacally, before nearly coughing up a hairball.

Ethan smiles, "I just love the way your foul little mind works..."

Meanwhile, in a dessert oasis near the Cave of Wonders, Carpet flies to a dune near a pool of water and starts to descend to earth. Anya directs Willow, Makyrah and Miss Kitty (looking just a little bit shaken up) off a step Carpet has made. Anya looks at Willow smugly, "So how about that Ms. Doubt-a-lot?"

Willow smiles, nudging Makyrah, she knows that they are about to back Anya into a corner..."Yes, that was very good, you convinced me I guess." Anya smiles, "Now, about my three wishes..."

Anya again looks smug, "Did you say three mistress? No, no, no, no, no. You are down by one."

"Nuh uh," Makyrah chips in, "Willow never actually wished to get out of the cave."

It's Willow's turn to look smug, "Nope, you did that by yourself."

Anya looks shocked, it's just sunk in that she was played, then she smiles, "Ok you bad girl, I'll give you that one, full marks for moxy. But from now on, no more freebies ok? It's against union rules."

Willow grins, "Sounds fair enough, so, three wishes." Willow thinks for a moment, then she turns to Anya, "Hey, what would you wish for?"

Again, Anya looks a little shocked, "I don't know really, it's never come up. Well, I guess in my case, I would... no, it sounds silly."

Makyrah encourages her, "No, go on."

"I guess I would wish to be free."

Willow looks at Anya for a moment, "You're a prisoner?"

Anya nods a little sadly, "It's whole part and parcel of the genie gig, all the power you could dream of... itty bitty living space."

Willow looks sad herself as she thinks what Anya has to go through, "That's so sad."

"But oh, to be free, not to have to be on the beck and call of any whim my current master has, that would be greater to me than all the treasure and all the magic in all the world." Anya had a look of hope on her face, then she looks forlorn, "But yeah right, like that will ever happen, wake up and smell the freakin mocha."

"Why not?"

"The only way out of this is if my master wishes me out, all the other guys, they've been too busy getting whatever they can."

Willow looks excited, "I'll do it, I'll wish you out."

Anya looks cynical, "Yeah right, pull the other one."

"No wait, I will. After I make my first two wishes, I'll use my third to set you free." Willow holds her hand out, "What do you say?"

Anya thinks for a moment then takes Willow's hand, "Here's hoping kid, ok, let's make some magic! So, Willow, what do you want most in the world."

Willow thinks for a moment, "Well, there's this girl."

A big ol' Family Fortunes board appears across Anya's chest complete with a yellow cross, "Nyeh eh, I can't make people fall in love remember? The powers that be are all uptight about that whole free will thing... not like it ever works with me."

"But Anya, she is so smart and fun and..."


Willow goes off into a dreamworld, "Her hair, man, her eyes! Her smile, it makes me want to melt."

Anya just watches Willow, "So romantic."

"Yeah, slight snag though, she's a Princess, to have a shot I'd have to be..." Willow thinks for a minute, "Wait, can you make me a Pri... uh... make me look like a Prince?"

Anya pulls out a big cookbook with "Royal Recipes" on the front, "Hmm, chicken ala king?" A big chicken's head pops out of the book and Anya shoves it back in, "Nope, hmm, Alaskan King Crab... ouch! Not that either, hmm, nor that, nope, Caesar's Salad," a dagger tries to stab Anya in the chest, "Hmm, a little too masculine no? Hmm, ah here it is, to make a Prince." Anya looks slyly across at Willow, "Now, this is an official wish right? Say them words girl!"

"Anya, I wish for you to make me a Prince!"

A red siren appears from nowhere and horns hoot, Anya momentarily has to shout above the noise, "That's my girl, now... hmm, let's see, those rags you are wearing, what are we trying to say here? Beggar? Nah, we need something..." Anya starts to take Willow's measurements with a tape measure, "Ah, I have just the thing, you will love it!" Anya clicks her fingers and see that Willow is now decked out in a white baggy shirt, a royal blue jacket and white pants, "Tres chic no?"

Willow looks down at herself, hardly able to believe her eyes.

"And now, Makyrah, baby, baby, baby, we cannot have you looking like that, oh no." With another click of the fingers, Makyrah finds herself in translucent yellow veils, one of these across the bottom half of her face. Anya clicks her fingers again and a mirror appears in front of Willow and Makyrah as Anya looks at them critically. "Hmm, there is still something missing, something... aha! You need a mode of transportation! Hmm... Miss Kitty, over here mes ami."

Miss Kitty looks terrified and runs to try and hide behind Carpet but Anya points at her and Miss Kitty finds herself in the air, "Now, won't you look stylish riding to Agrabah on your very own, brand new camel! Watch out, it spits." Miss Kitty suddenly finds herself transformed into a camel and spits on cue, "Hmm, not enough, how about..." Anya clicks her fingers a few times and Miss Kitty turns into a white horse, a duck, an eagle, a black stretch limo and finally back to herself, then a lightbulb pops above Anya's head. "Aha! Keeping with the black cat motif you seem to have going... Aya kalia muntha!" Anya points her finger and Miss Kitty and she turns into a large black pantha.

Miss Kitty looks down at herself in a pool and backs away in terror before running pell mell into a pile of rocks... who put them there? Miss Kitty sees rocks spinning above her head as Willow walks over and pats her on the head, "Very pretty compadre."

Anya walks over also, "Well, we have the outfits, we have the transportation! But we are not done yet, oh no. We are gonna make you a star!"

Continue to Queen of Thieves Chapter Seven

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