Author: Sweetwitchbitch2003 A camp. [Enter KING GUNGHO, MALLCAT, LORD BLUEBERRY and the CAPTAIN.] Gungho: Dog, I can't believe it! I'm King! And hey, do I look tight in this crown or what? How unlikely is this? Mallcat: Pretty unlikely, Dad. But she that hath made us is of crazy origination and fevered imagination. Gungho: Don't you be rhyming on me, son. Mallcat: Sorry, Dad. I'm just saying, enjoy it while you can. You'll probably get killed off in the second act anyway. Gungho: Hey, that bleeding guy over there; [Mallcat and Lord Blueberry drag the Captain over. Needless to say, he's in a pretty bad state and bleeds all over the royal carpet.] Gungho: Sup, man? Mallcat: This is the sergeant, Captain: I could not say, Gungho (irritated): No more rhyming, by royal decree! And you know you don't wanna be messin' with the king, y'all. Captain: Yes sir! Gungho: Shut up, soldier-boy. Captain: Yes sir. Gungho: This MacBuff sounds like a real pain in the ass. Blueberry: Forgive me, my liege, but I think she's on our side. Gungho: Oh. Well in that case it's alright then. Captain: Your Majesty? I'm feeling pretty faint, actually. Gungho: Quit your whining, man. You ain't got nothin' but a little scratch. And it ain't a good idea to die all over my royal carpet. Captain (glances at his gash): Gosh, is that... blood? [Captain faints. Lord Blueberry kicks him, just to make sure.] Blueberry: Bloody wuss has fainted. Gungho: Medic! [Little Oompa-Loompa-looking Attendants come in and drag the Captain offstage in a completely uncaring manner] Gungho: Hey, who's that coming? Mallcat: The worthy thane of Kross. Blueberry: What a haste looks through his eyes! So should he look [Enter KROSS and Silent Angus.] Kross (sarcastically): God save the bloody king. Gungho: Whence cam'st thou, worthy thane? Kross: From sodding Fife, where'd you think? Gungho: Aww, I love happy endings. Kross: Now Sven, Norway's king, craves American sit-coms Gungho: No more shall that thane of Sunnydale deceive, Kross: Oh, I'm your sodding messenger boy now, am I? Gungho: Just do it! I don't got time for these bitchin' matches. I gotta be all kingly and stuff. Kross: I'll see it done. [Kross leaves with Silent Angus.] Gungho: What he hath lost, noble MacBuff hath won. |