Return to The Sex Journals Part Seventeen

The Sex Journals

Author: Washi (ZWS)
Rating: NC-17 baby!
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, Joss does or whoever. If I owned them, do you really think I would let season 6 happen? And why the hell would I be writing this? So yeah, all belongs to Joss, ME etc...

"Are you sure?" Willow asked again, looking at Tara intensely in the eyes.

"Yes, I want to give myself to you Willow, I want to try it." The blonde replied, not one ounce of shyness in her tone.

The redhead nodded and got out of the bed, her skin glistening with sweat. She moved to the closet, the blonde's eyes riveted on her lithe figure, on the muscles moving under the damp, shiny skin. Willow bent over, giving her lover a clear view of her shapely ass and her puffy outer lips, glimmering with arousal. The redhead smirked, feeling her lover's gaze on the juices that were smeared on her upper thighs. She rummaged in the box in front of her and finally pulled out a blue dildo and black harness. She swayed her ass to and fro for a few seconds, and heard the blonde's sharp intake of breath. She straightened up and turned around.

Her lover's eyes were dark, her pupils almost shadowing the deep blue of her eyes. She sat there, lips parted, her eyes riveted on Willow's body. The redhead smiled and walked over to her lover, swaying her hips provocatively. She stopped right in front of Tara and looked deep into her eyes.

"Like whatcha see?" the redhead purred.

The blonde could only nod. She felt her arousal coming back again, even though Willow had just relieved her of the tension. She slowly extended her hand and tried touching the redhead, but Willow moved just out of arm's reach. Tara whimpered.

"No touching, at least, no touching me." Willow told her girl, a lecherous grin on her face.

Tara's eyes widened. "What do you mean?"

"I want to see you." The redhead repeated, running a hand slowly down her own stomach.

"You're looking at me right now." Tara replied somewhat dumbly.

Willow giggled. "I know that silly, but I want to see you touching yourself. Loving your own body."

Tara blushed and Willow quickly backpedaled. "I mean, if that's what you want. I mean, I'd love it for us to, you know, be able to be comfortable with masturbation. I know it's kinda, sorta taboo, but I think it'll add to the intimacy of our couple, but if you don't want to, that's, that's fine too. I mean, I just thought that, maybe..." Willow stopped babbling as her lover laid back some, opening her legs, displaying herself.

Tara looked back up at Willow, sending her a scorching look that made the other girl just gulp, any thought that Tara wouldn't like the idea flying out the window.

Holding Willow's gaze, Tara slowly reached up, cupping a firm breast in her hand. She started massaging it, squeezing and rubbing, occasionally tugging on a hard nipple, moaning at the contact. She spread her legs wide open, her pussy lips also opening, showing Willow how wet she was. The redhead watched, entranced, as a new sluice of wetness trickled out from her lover's entrance. The redhead wished she could just lay down and lick it off, suck it off, taste it in her mouth. Willow leant forward and her nose twitched with recognition, she could smell Tara, could see Tara's wetness, and yet, she couldn't touch her. She tried though, slowly reaching for her lover's neglected breast, only to have Tara swipe her hand away.

"You did say no touching." The blonde replied, her voice breathy and shallow.

Willow pouted and swallowed. "I want a closer view. I won't touch, just want closer view." She inwardly berated herself for her lack of oral skills. <Sound like cave-woman.>

Tara smiled and decided she was going to tease her redhead even more, so she nodded, moving backwards on the bed, and Willow laid herself face down just in front of Tara's weeping pussy.

The blonde's fingers slowly made their way to her own core and, once arrived, she slowly ran her forefinger though her wetness, moaning and hearing Willow's muffled reply.

Tara woke up to find herself on the bed, with Willow sleeping deeply beside her, their arms wrapped around each other.

Images from her dream came back to her, and she shuddered with arousal. She felt sticky, and she shifted slightly, only to find that every move she made rubbed her puffy pussy lips against her throbbing clit, driving her further into madness. Slowly, she moved her right hand down and found that her wetness was almost dripping onto the bedspread. <Thank the Goddess, I'm sleeping on my side.> She whimpered at the slight contact her index finger made with her swollen nub and knew that she needed to release the tension. A cold shower wouldn't suffice, and she craned her neck to get a glimpse of the alarm clock on her night table. The soothing green numbers showed proudly that the time was four am. Turning back to face Willow again, she took in her deep, steady breathing and knew she shouldn't wake up her lover.

Tara decided that touching herself while her girlfriend was sleeping right next to her was rude, perverse as well as tacky. She made a decision and got up slowly, making sure she didn't wake Willow up. The redhead whimpered in her sleep, and Tara quickly put a pillow in the now empty arms. Quickly putting on her terry-cloth robe, she slipped from the bedroom quietly.

She padded her way to the first room on her right. It was Willow's office. The whole room was furnished in deep dark colors, and Tara thought it was very sensual, especially after she and Willow had made love on the big sturdy desk. Licking her lips, Tara quickly walked to the midnight blue velvet chaise lounge and draped her robe over it. She then sat down, biting back a moan as all of these simple movements rubbed subtly her clit. The darkness of the room was soothing as she relaxed herself and closed her eyes.

She started touching her breasts fleetingly, barely brushing her fingers on her hard, swollen nipples. She wanted to go slow, to prolong her pleasure as much as she could. She lightly massaged the full globes of flesh and teased herself lightly, running the pads of her fingers up and down her collarbone. Biting her lower lip on concentration, she decided to move on to the next stage and quickly raised two fingers of her right hand to her mouth, quickly coating them with her saliva before circling her rock hard left nipple with them. She groaned and flexed her hips, trying instinctively to find something to rub herself against.

After giving the same treatment to her other nipple, she squeezed both of them hard, sending bolts of white-hot pleasure to her core. Once again, her hips bucked, and she could barely restrain herself from just plunging two fingers inside and pumping them until she exploded. Instead, she kept squeezing and tweaking her nipples, watching them as they grew even more. She pulled on one while her other hand was massaging her other breast almost roughly.

Closing her eyes, she thought back to that night when she had touched herself for Willow before the redhead had put on the strap-on and they had 'fucked' until they collapsed from sheer exhaustion. She bit her lower lip again as the images almost overpowered her and she slowly moaned out loud.

Like that night, she spread her knees and slowly touched herself, rubbing the palm of her hand against her swollen and weeping pussy. She could feel her arousal dripping out of her and she wished that Willow was there at that moment. But, the redhead was asleep and quite exhausted, so she needed to finish this herself. She increased the pressure of her palm and hissed with pleasure. Her palm was pushing her puffy lips against her clit, effectively rubbing it. One of her hands drifted up to her left breast and squeezed it hard, intensifying her arousal, her need for release and her pleasure. A new gush of wetness soaked her hand, which only started slipping against the soft, swollen flesh faster.

Tossing her head back, she moaned low in her throat as her palm continued rubbing wetly, and as her fingers twisted her nipple. Groaning, her hand sped up and she knew she could come just from that. But, she slowed herself again, restraining herself. She didn't want to come yet. Taking her hand from between her legs, her hips protested as her hips bucked upwards again. She liked the moisture from her hand and purred. Her taste wasn't as good as Willow's but it would do for now. Her whole body glistened with moisture and she decided to finally finish what she started.

Slowly, both of their hands drifted down to her mound and slowly parted her outer lips. Her fingertips rubbed the inside of them, slowly, teasingly. Closing her eyes once more, she decided to touch her clit and just come, she needed it. She lightly touched her hard swollen nub, groaning.

"Whatcha doing?" A voice suddenly piped up at the same time the light came on.

In an instant, Tara's eyes flew open, her hand withdrew from it's warm and snug haven and she shrieked. Her eyes went directly to the smug-looking person resting lightly against the doorway. Dark green eyes were locked on her own, the pupils dilated almost to the point where the jade irises were taken over. Desire pulsed steadily from the woman, and her eyes drifted down her lover's body, still spread wide open for her.

"Will..." her voice was raw after the shriek, but it wasn't only for that.

"You didn't answer me baby... What were ya doing?" Willow asked, waggling her eyebrows.

"Um, I... um, I..., um..." Tara didn't know what to say.


"I was touching m-myself." Tara replied, her breathing uneven.

She watched as Willow walked closer to her, dropping her robe in the process. And Tara waited for her, her eyes riveted on the slender body coming to her. She licked her lips and gasped as Willow grabbed her right wrist, the cool touch making her aware of how hot her own body was. Eyes locked, Willow raised Tara's hand to her nose, inhaling the scent of her lover deeply. Tara's gaze wavered when Willow took the still wet digits in her mouth, bathing them with her tongue, almost purring as her lover's taste sizzled on her tongue. Letting go of the fingers, she sniffed on her lover's palm before placing a lingering open-mouthed kiss there, her tongue peeking out to flicker on the sweet flesh.

Her eyes took in her lover, the deep blue of her eyes, the way she was worrying her lower lips, the way she muffled her groans, and Willow felt her arousal skyrocketing. She let go of her wrist and bent down slowly to kiss her. Lips touched and parted, as Willow cupped Tara's face in her hands and ran her thumbs over the soft skin. Tara needed to feel her lover's body close to hers, and she wrapped her arms around her waist before pulling the redhead to her.

Their kiss was broken for a moment, just enough for Willow to take her new position on top of the blonde, one thigh wedged tightly between her lover's, their bodies tightly pressed together, Willow's erect nipples poking Tara's bigger breasts. Tara's groan made Willow slowly rock her hips forwards as they continued kissing, their tongues dancing frantically.

"Faster please..." Tara pleaded, pushing Willow slightly away, enough to be able to feast on her neck. Her hands, meanwhile, migrated to Willow's firm ass, trying to speed up their rhythm.

Willow shook her head, the heat from both their bodies melting her vision so that only Tara's face was clear.

"Slow is good. Slow is good." Willow almost babbled, slowing their rhythm again Her heart was pounding fiercely, and she was sure that Tara's heart rhythm was matching her own.

Willow gave one slow, deep thrust of her hips, and Tara closed her eyes. "Slow is very gooood..." Tara moaned out as the friction rubbed exactly where she needed. She tossed her head back and closed her eyes for an instant. When she reopened them, she looked directly into Willow's depth, and the redhead felt like her heart was about to explode. She couldn't refrain from kissing her lover.

Their lips pressed tightly, before they began brushing together. Willow pulled back slightly, just enough to open her mouth, before she dived back into the kiss, her tongue thrusting into the wet haven below hers. Tara's tongue met hers, and they caressed each other, in slow languorous strokes.

Willow broke the kiss and looked at Tara, who returned her gaze.

"I love you." She whispered, her eyes shining with emotion. Her hands drifted to Tara's face, tracing her features with immense gentleness. With equal tenderness, she brushed the stray hair off Tara's face, caressing her face softly.

"I love you too Willow. I always have." The blonde replied, raising a hand to her beloved's cheek.

Willow didn't reply vocally, but her smile said everything. She leaned down and kissed her lover tenderly.

Tara touched her hand to Willow's temple. "What's going on in that head?"

"Nothing, it's just that... I love you. I love you so much it hurts sometimes. And... and after what happened, I still wonder sometimes what I did that was so... great, for the powers to give you back to me after the mess I did. And, I... I guess I'm still shocked that after all this time, all these stupid things I've done, you're here, with me, making a life with me. It just... it blows my mind. Because, I want you to be mine, not just today and tomorrow, but always." Willow stopped, kicking herself inwardly for her babble. She had basically proposed to Tara and babbled the speech she had been preparing. Her furrowed brow relaxed though, when she remembered that Tara didn't know about the gay weddings being legalized. She started dancing happily in her head, thanking the gods and goddesses that she hadn't blown it. Her voice was cut short, however when she heard Tara's voice.

"I am you know."

Startled out of her mind-dance, she looked at Tara questionably and said the first thing that came to her mind.


"Yours." Tara replied, her eyes locked on Willow's, showing her how much she meant the statement.

The smile on Willow's face grew, and she once again dipped her head to kiss Tara. This time though, the kiss deepened as their hands started wandering again. Willow's hands found Tara's soft breasts, and she groaned. She tested their weight like she had thousands of times before, and marveled at the feeling that flooded her being every time she touched her lover. Tara moaned softly, her nipples hardening under her lover's ministrations, and she started rocking her hips again.

Willow broke the kiss, bending her head to take one engorged nipple in her mouth. She rolled her tongue around it, sucking lightly all the while. Tara's hands held onto Willow's auburn hair, pulling lightly. She arched her back and urged her lover to take more of her quivering flesh into her mouth. Willow did that and rubbed the nipple against the ridges of the roof of her mouth, making Tara flew her hips more forcefully. Willow switched breasts and started sucking hard on the swollen nipple, and their speed picked up once more.

The stimulation to her center was making Willow insane. She pulled up from Tara's breasts, earning a dissatisfied groan and she started rocking her hips faster. Tara moaned loudly and wrapped her leg around Willow's moving hips, pushing their bodies closer together. Their eyes were locked together as they moved, each thrust pushing them more towards the precipice of pleasure that was awaiting them.

"Yes.... Ohhhh Yess!!!" Tara hissed in pleasure, feeling herself close to the edge.

Willow vocalized her pleasure too, and they came together, eyes locked, their moans drowning out everything.

Willow fell slightly on top of her lover, exhausted. They both turned slightly to their sides, their limbs entangled. They shared a few lazy kisses, and then, they just stared at each other, gazing deep into the eyes that held them captive. The love in Tara's eyes blinded Willow, and she almost let herself drown in it. Suddenly, she didn't care anymore about fancy proposals. She didn't care about anything but this woman who had won her heart and who held it safely in her arms. All the rest was and meant nothing to her.


The blonde girl nodded.

"Would you marry me?"

Tara's eyes widened. "What?"

Willow gulped and repeated her question. Tara looked at her as if she had sprouted a second head.

"Sweetie, you know that if we could, I'd marry you in a second. But we can't, it's against this country's laws." Tara replied, her voice soothing.

"No, it's not anymore, or at least, it won't be in a couple of months. Gay Marriages are being legalized in Sunnydale in a couple of months. So? Will you?" Willow asked again, holding Tara's trembling hand with her own.

Tears quickly started streaming down Tara's face, but these were tears of happiness. "Yes! Yes! I will! I love you! I love you!"

Willow's smile almost took over her whole face as she let out a big "Woo Hoo!" and hugged her lover close, almost crushing her in her hug. Pulling back, she placed kisses all over her lover's face, giggling and crying at the same time.

"We have to go tomorrow, together, and pick up the ring. I already have it ordered. You can't believe how happy you've just made me. I'll take care of you, and cherish you and love you and..."

Tara quickly interrupted her with a kiss, that became many kisses, before pulling her up and taking tem both to their bedroom, where they made love all night, giving each other promises of eternal love.

Continue to The Sex Journals Part Nineteen

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