With age comes worry-ness and stress, especially in the life that is mine. Crazy stuff happens, it piles on, you take care of it, the world doesn't end and then you have a brief moment to pause before it all starts back up again. But after a while it can wear on you and your mind and your body just breaks down.
After the last time we spoke with you more real life caught up with us. Just a financing problem with the house. I really don't want to bore you with the details right now. It is still a little fresh in my mind and makes me go all grrr and get large with the butch.
So another apocalypse averted and then it hit me... the death flu. Okay it wasn't really as bad as that sounds. It just happened to be a particularly bad strain of the flu bug going around and I caught it because my body was stressed and weakened which is the perfect sort of environment that those little nasties prefer.
Yeah I really really don't like being sick. I'm actually kind of a wuss when it comes to being sick. When I do get sick of course it all comes at once and it's hard and it sucks and well... I just don't handle it very well. Though being sick does have a few advantages like my baby takes care of me. Actually I'd like to amend that. My baby always takes care of me. It's when I'm sick that she takes extra special care of me. Actually I'm going to amend that again... she is an angel for putting up with me is really how it works.
See it isn't all goodness when I'm sick. I'm not allowed to move or have caffeine, she gives me this yucky bitter tea with no sugar and usually I end up being forced to see a doctor. And I'm crabby and whiny and pathetic, and I know it. But I do get lots of attention and love despite the fact that I have to be difficult to put up with.
It was a Thursday and typical of my morning schedule I didn't want to get out of bed. Tara however had let me be. Usually she convinces me to hop to it with promises of smoochies and pancakes. So when I woke up I woke up cranky and then got even more cranky when I noticed my warm snuggle buddy was not in sight. I grunted my dissent and she suddenly appeared bringing the tea. I grunted my dissent again.
Tara can always sense when I'm sick. It maybe that she's hypersensitive of me it could be part of the fact that she is in tune with everything and everyone around her. Either way she tends to know how I'm feeling usually before I've registered it. Yeah I am in tune with her the same... only she is much better at it. Anyways she pretty much knew I was sick before I had even fully woken up.
"Sit up. Drink this." She told me. Her short tongue and tone indicated one thing. 'Don't argue.' It was then that I picked up that she was a little stressed too. I used to think I could get away with anything. I would do my pout, quiver my lower lip and give my puppy dog eyes. And she would give in. She would always give in. Or so I thought anyways.
First of all when she is stressed as well she is less likely to put up with my shit. Also it turns out I usually asked for things she didn't mind giving into anyways you know extra snuggles or an extra shot in my mocha even though it will keep me up all night. See Tara is a naturally giving person she enjoys seeing other people smile. So she agrees and I smile and then she smiles and well she has a smile that can light up the darkest room and melt the coldest of hearts.
Ah but the thing is Tara won't give to something she truly believes in. From an outside observer she may look like a pushover but there is a point where you can push too much. Trust me I've toed the line once or twice myself. Similarly she's stood up for me when I was being pushed. I mean I thought I had the resolve face but when my girl is determined she is determined.
But you're distracting me from my point. Or at least I think I have a point. Right back to the story. So I sipped the tea slowly as per Tara's instructions. One time I tried to gulp it down quickly and get the whole bad tastiness down in one go but that didn't go over well. It works best hot and sipped slowly apparently. Though not too slowly cause the whole works better when its hot thing and when it is hot it is hard to drink it down in a big gulp because that burns.
Sorry I'm doing it again. So Tara continued about her morning ritual as I sipped my tea. She called the office for me and warned them I might not be in today and probably tomorrow as well. I tried to claim that I felt fine really and could at least get some work done at home. But it wasn't very convincing as I coughed and split tea on myself and the bed.
I thought I was gonna get it for that one. But instead I got a giggle which made me very happy. Though I could tell there was a smidgen of annoyance that flashed in her eyes when she realised that I had just spilled tea all over the bed and it was going to have to be cleaned up.
I was told to head towards the couch where Tara would set me up there for some quality sitting and doing nothing time. She placed more tea and toast on the coffee table for me, got me some pillows and a blanket, placed a remote in my hands, kissed my goodbye, told me to be good and headed off to work.
It didn't take long however after the news was over for the boredom to set it. I'm not really a fan of those morning talk shows so I headed into my office. I figured I could at least get a little work done. Out of habit I logged into ICQ and immediate received that annoying 'oh uh' as a message popped up. Uh oh was right. "Don't even think about it." Was all it said. It was from Tara. She sent it before she left this morning.
I was defiant however. Tara wouldn't be home until lunch and I could work until then and head back to the couch. She'd never have to know right? So I ignored her warning and logged on to the company network. I tried to open the project file that I had been assigned to but I got an error message. I had been blocked. Shortly after another message came up. It was from my boss. It wasn't ICQ but the 'uh oh' went off in my brain anyways. "I assigned it to Jones. Don't make me call your wife." 'Damn' I thought, 'they're in cahoots.'
I was excited though because they gave it to Jones. Last time I was sick they handed my project down to Carter and it took me two days to fix it. But that isn't the point. Karma had known that I was in defiance of Tara's order and the cold hit me full force. My head got all dizzy and stuffy and my throat got tingly and itchy. So I relented and got my sorry ass back to the couch.
I turned on the stereo knowing that Tara had stocked the player with my favourite mixed CD of calm and mellow music. It helps me to sleep when I don't have a nice warm Tara shaped pillow to snuggle against. I closed my eyes and waited for the pounding in my head to disappear.
I was woken up by Tara whispering in my ear. "Wake up sweetie. You need to eat something." Apparently she had been home for a while because she already had warm soup for me. "Glad to see you were resting" she said. "And not trying to work." she added. She knew... she always knows. I asked her if my boss did call like he had warned me. Turns out I had left the computer on. She always knows because I always give myself away. At least I remembered to log off the company network.
I could tell she was in a better mood though than she had been this morning. I think she gets a certain kind of joy when picking on a poor pathetic sick redhead. So after lunch and more teasing Tara informed me she'd taken the afternoon off. She always has lots of sick days that she never uses.
And as compensation for picking on me I managed to pout my way into Tara and I doing my favourite sick time activity. Don't look at me like that... I know what you're thinking. No when I'm sick I can get Tara to tell me stories. We snuggle up and Tara tells me happy Lesbian Fairy Tales where evil is defeated because its evil and the girls live happily ever after with half camels and/or watch cows. And they usually star a babbling redhead and a gorgeous, shy, caring, wonderful blonde.
That is how it usually goes when I am sick. It happens often enough we've got a pattern down. You know what is funny? Not funny ha-ha but more funny ironic. In her stories she always has me save her. Like I'm the big hero, knight in shining armour to the rescue. But in truth she saves me. Every morning I wake up, every time I get lost in her eyes, every single day... she saves me.